Mary Merrell

Mary was born in Grand Rapids, Michigan to Hermine and Harvey Bouwkamp on June 12th, 1950. She was a happy go lucky baby, who was always smiling and laughing. She had three brothers (Bill, Paul, and Chet) and two sisters (Betsy and Nina). With the help of her siblings, she would torment her brother Chet and they developed a very close bond. Mary loved her family and would do anything for them. Mary loved to go to Aunt Sabina’s and Uncle Joe’s place on the Muskegon River. There, wearing her cowgirl hat, she would drive the boat up and down the river. She loved to catch crayfish on a stick and torment her Aunt’s who came in high heels. Mary loved to ride the Black horses on the carousel at Ramona Park. She loved dogs but could not have one. She made up for this deprivation latter in life.

Mary was a typical teen of the time. She loved rock and roll. We still have the Paul doll that Nina gave her and it is in a special at her home. Mary had a passion for music and became an accomplished pianist, but she was reluctant to perform for others. So she skipped her piano recital and barely passed her college course. Mary played with great expression and feeling, she made the music come alive. Mary graduated from Mercy College in Detroit. While in college Mary had a VW Beatle that was Battle Ship Grey and latter she owned a Karman Ghia. Mary loved her cars and her first fight with Dave, as a newlywed, was over how to wash her car.

Mary first met her soul-mate, Dave Merrrell at a dance at the Canonsburg Ski Lodge in 1968. However, Mary was unaware yet that this man was her one true love. They danced to the Doors “Light My Fire” but Mary did not recall that chance meeting.

After graduating from college, Mary returned to Grand Rapids and was living in the family home. One day her brothers Bill and Paul asked her to fix them lunch. Wise beyond her years, Mary decided to nip this in the bud. She boiled hamburger and served this concoction on bread, soon soggy with the water-drenched hamburger. She was never asked by her brothers to fix a meal again.

Mary had several jobs after college and she worked at Corduroy Rubber Co. where she met Dave. Dave was her Foremen and questioned why she would want to work in such a place. She took offense to this. But true loved blossomed and they started dating. However, Dave had to fire Mary so she could not join the union, and love took a hiatus. A year later, Tina (Mary’s best friend) and Mary were at the Frolic Bar where Dave ate lunch. A conversation was started and Dave got to meet crazy Wiley, Mary’s dog. Dave passed the Wiley test and Wiley liked Dave’s Lab Raven. True love was found during a beautiful autumn. Autumn was their most favorite time of the year.

Dave and Mary were married in at St Alfonse Church on a sunny April 12,1975. This church had a large pipe organ and Mary had “Phantom of the Opera” played as they left the church. Hermine and Dave’s dad Ken had a discussion about worms during the reception dinner. Latter back at the Bouwkamp’s house, Johnny Mowatt plugged up the toilet by unrolling an entire roll of toilet paper in the toilet. Nephew Chris Packala played with Wiley in the mud and created quite a mess. Dave was told by his father in-law-to Harvey take care of Mary and Hermine told Dave to not let Mary boss him around. That was sound advice that Mary circumvented. What a send off.

Mary and Dave started a new adventure in Flint. Soon afterwards Dave was transferred to Muskegon to run a branch office. They moved to Coopersville (Home of Del Shannon), where they bought their first home. The highlight of their week was going to the Randall house for a burger or Shopping at Meijer’s with a stop at Wendy’s for dinner. Their first family dinner was out of the Keystone Kops. A dog with a gunshot in the hip camped out on the front porch. Her brothers were afraid to eat and Hermine tried to burn the house down by shorting out the mixer on the stove burner. Nina accidently spilled all of the dinner rolls into the gravy pan. Family dinners were an adventure with Mary but she was an excellent hostess and every one had a wonderful time. Mary taught nephew Johnny how to clean a turkey with a flash light and rubber gloves even though she had no clue how to accomplish this chore.

Mary and Dave started a new adventure in Flint, where Mary worked for Dave’s dad, Ken, as the office manager. Ken would ask for another paycheck. As it would mess up the books at the end of the month, Mary would deny the request. Mary would also take photos of Ken napping. One day a prospective employee came out of Ken’s office with a terrified look on her face. Mary had to inform Ken, he had left his false teeth in his ashtray. Mary also kept a shotgun by her desk and was given instructions who to drop at the door. Mary tried to go Bow hunting with Dave. She had a deer jump in front of her one day and could not shoot it after she saw its brown eyes. Thus ended her urge to eat venison.

Mary and Dave then moved to Marshall Mi. Mary adopted a stray Alaskan malamute named Nick. One day a neighbor came over and asked if we had seen her cat named baby and she was implying that Nick had killed her cat. Mary told Mary that if Nick would have killed baby he would have eaten everything but the head. Mary never came back to see us.

Mary worked for Win Schuler’s. She was a taste tester among her many duties. Everyone joked, how bland their food was, after she started that job. Mary fought her first bought of cancer while in Marshall. She was a three pack a day smoker. She quit cold turkey. What a difference from smoking in the shower to get her nicotine fix to quitting. If Mary made up her mind to do something, it was accomplished. Mary started buying cats in Marshall. One was a Himalayan cross eyed cat named Morgan. On a trip to Northern Mi, Mary collected sand and small stones and put it in a glass case. This was her magic charm so they would move to northern Mi. A year later they moved to Traverse City.

Mary and Dave rented a home when they moved to Traverse City. Mary Affectionately called the rental the “NOT HOME”. They could not agree on a home to buy so they built their current home on old mission peninsula. Mary drove the builder crazy by making sure he honored the all agreement in the contact to build their home. At the end of the project, the builder cried and claimed he was abducted by Aliens while building their home. Mary loved to watch the Twilight Zone and Star Trek.

In the latter years, Mary often made the drive to Grand Rapids to take care of her Mom and Dad. She anticipated all of their needs and was a real Angel to them.

Mary wanted to make the perfect blueberry pie for Dave (his favorite). Sally Gore taught her how to make a light flakey crust. Mary served the masterpiece to Dave. He said it was good but he preferred a soggy crust.

Mary worked as an engineering Expeditor for several different plants in TC. Though her jobs were demanding, she never lost her sense of humor. One time she was displeased with her raise and told her boss the raise would not buy bait for the boat as she knew her boss could not afford a boat. Mary had the gifts of a quick wit and great wisdom. She had a great common sense that would come into play, in a flash. It always came in time of need with unique articulation. Mary had a flare for sensing people and reading between the words. She was always a best friend, loyal and fair in all situations. Mary was a trusted friend, always confidential and protective of all.

Mary loved her cars. She would not park next to anyone so she did not get door dings. God help the person who parked too close to her. If you rode with Mary, you walked a mile to the door as she always parked in the lot where there were no cars. Mary loved to collect paper weights, flashlights, jewelry, clothes ,harps, etc. She was a true Dutch person and drove a hard bargain. She drove car salesman nuts. Mary was on a first name basis with all of the clothing shop owners in every small town in northern Michigan. Dave knew he was in trouble when he walked in a store and they said hi Mary. But it made Christmas shopping easy for Dave. Mary and Nina loved to go to the all the different towns near Traverse City and shop. They would occasionally stop at a Casino and try to break the bank. Mary would also assist her friend Pam at Pam’s yard sale. It was an outlet store for Mary’s unwanted new clothes.

Mary fell in love with the Celtic harp. She played for Hospice, Nursing home patients and disabled ones in their home. Mary was a hospice volunteer and she joined the Harp To Harp Group. She loved to take Harp lessons from Mary Mintz. They had a ball in our living room talking and laughing. They even played the harp once in awhile.

When Mary’s cancer returned and started to overwhelm her, she fought back by turning Vegan. What a tough diet that was. She was assisted in her fight against CANCER by her sisters Nina and Betsy, and her dear friends Carmen Howard and Michel Hicks. Mary would like us all to learn from her mistakes and lead a healthy lifestyle.

Mary’s last trip with Dave was too Amanda and Chad’s wedding in Vermont. They stayed in Montreal one night. It drove her nuts as there were a lot unique boutiques near the Hotel. She could not walk very far to explore another shopping paradise. It was a wonderful last trip with Mary as they enjoyed spending time with family, went to Liillydale New York, Salem, and Niagara Falls.

Attached is a philosophy Betsy summed up about Mary. It is exactly as she felt. So do not be sad about Mary’s passing. As Dave said as he reflected back on thirty seven years with Mary, I feel I am the luckiest guy in the world. Let’s celebrate her life for what she brought to each and every one of us.

Mary and Dave were Sole- Mates. Mary taught Dave how to use his right brain. Mary would like us all to continue to discover the unknown and learn about the adventures of the mind. Life is short so do not be complacent in telling how much we love each other.

Mary has impacted us in so many ways. Celebrate her life and continue on the journey of learning as she has paved the way for us.

Mary will never be forgotten.

Your spirit comes into this world in a physical form to learn lessons necessary to achieve oneness with the creator of all light. When you have learned these lessons you will again pass through the door to a new life on another level of learning.

You do not lose your loved ones in death. They merely pass through the door to a new life on another plane. It is their necessary experience; do not hold them back. Do not hold your loved ones to the earth after death; do make them earth-bound spirits; release them. They have important work to do on the next plane.

You do not die but experience a beautiful awakening to a continuity of life on a new level. It is a new level of cosmic consciousness beyond the limits of the physical body; oneness with the ultimate light.

Your soul is the only thing that you possess from here to eternity. Live each day in the consciousness of your soul's oneness with the ultimate light. You will have no fears of the next step beyond but will pass to the soul's next creative expression with peace and happiness. Your loved ones will still be with you now and again as has been in prior earth plane experiences. Your communication is now beyond the physical and within the higher energy planes of the nonphysical mind. PRINCIPLES of BEING that Mary I shared in strong belief. Betsy